My Top Ten (and counting) Uses for Coconut Oil

Coconut Oil has been taking on the world as more and more people discover the many uses for it. And when I say many uses, I mean countless. Seriously! I recently discovered coconut oil after I gave birth to my son Jett. As you all know, he was premature. And with that being said, there's this awesome machine that you get hooked up to about every 3 hours for 20 minutes. AROUND THE CLOCK. Can you guess what machine I'm talking about? Well in case you haven't caught on, it's called a breast pump. YUP.

In order to give your baby the best without actually having to breastfeed, you gotta pump (this leads to a whole other story, I'll try not to get carried away). Well, this momma is giving her baby the best liquid gold that has ever existed. In the female world, we call this EPing, or Exclusively Pumping. The rules are as follows: 1). Pump every 3 hours or as often as your baby would eat 2). At each pumping session you should pump for approx. 15-20 minutes and two minutes past the last drop. Which never really worked out for me because my boobs are like a factory and they never stop making milk, and yes, I even leak-just like that old faucet at your grandmother's house that drip, drip, drips. (Okay too much! Sorry!) 3). You must pump during the night or a MOTN (middle of the night) pump just as your baby would wake you during the night to eat. And if you don't do everything as follows, you'll eventually lose your supply and go into a deep depression. And never, ever want to come out of it because your precious babes will never get another drop of liquid gold. And you may also experience a mild case of crazy because your daily life routine revolves around that stupid machine and you may or may not fall asleep at 3 am and accidentally spill 4 ounces of absolute hard work all over yourself. Sounds like fun, right?

I THOUGHT THIS WAS ABOUT COCONUT OIL LADY

Told you I would try to not get carried away. Anyways, with all of that being said, I've learned that along with all that mess I was talking about before, your, um, nipples, can I say that word? Okay get this giggles out, (hahahaha) your nipples get cracked, sore, dry like the flippin' Sahara Dessert and stretched out like one of Stretch Armstrong's leg (except my nipples don't retail for over $1,000).  And soon enough, you'll be avoiding the mirror every time you change your bra and you'll be standing like a hunchback in the shower because the drops of water feel like someone is shooting a pellet gun straight at those sore nips. THE THINGS WE DO FOR OUR CHILDREN.

In the hospital they give you this cream called Lanolin which apparently helps with soreness, cracks, its all natural and its safe for baby to digest. WELL THE SHIT SUCKS. At least for me it does. A lot of women rave over it and think its amazing. I hate it. It smells weird, it does not glide on smooth as the bottle says, it taste like nothing but sticks to your tongue (yes, I tried it. If it's okay for baby to digest then I'm gonna see what the heck it taste like).

1. Nipple Cream: So since I'm so smart I threw that crap out and bought myself a big ol' tub of Coconut Oil. I bought mine at our local whole foods store. But I've seen it at grocery stores, Wal Mart, and some Walgreens. I just take a little bit of that goodness on my finger and it instantly melts to my warmth. It glides on like a champ, smells and tastes good, is TOTALLY okay for baby to digest and coconut oil naturally has antifungal properties. So, it helps fight against any yeast infections you may get on your nipples (known as Thrush) as well as relieve soreness. I got my first case of thrush about 2 months into my pumping journey and discovered that Lanolin (that stuff they hand out in hospitals) actually helps yeast and bacteria grow. YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.

2. Make-Up Remover: When you are finally capable of taking care of yourself, i.e. showering, brushing your teeth, not looking like you just had a baby, you may start to wear makeup one day and maybe even feel pretty again! Yes, it's possible mommas! Ever feel like makeup remover is trying to burn your eyelashes off? Maybe it's just me, I do have super sensitive skin, but that crap burns! And then my face is all red and blotchy right before I hit the pillow and now I know why my husband falls asleep before I get a goodnight kiss. Just put that goodness right on your lids, rub it back and forth and wipe off with a cotton ball. I follow with a good splash of warm water to get rid of the residue.

3. Shaving Cream: Yep, that's right. I do not buy shaving cream. And unless you are a cave women, or you are a man reading this (hi honey!) you should know how to use shaving cream. I then follow up with cheap disposable razors instead of the $15 cartridges that fit on a razor head because the coconut oil really does all the work. Say goodbye to ingrown hairs and razor bumps! Remember the part about antifungal properties? Well it also helps get rid of those nasty things too!

4. Hair Mask: I rarely ever do a hair mask. Mainly because I don't have many issues with hair dullness or split ends (thank you hair goddesses). But, when I'm feeling like my hair has dealt with too much heat, looks dull, or has that nasty "you tease your hair too much" feel I get my hair wet and scoop some coconut oil right out the jar and drench my hair. I scrub my scalp with it and run it through my ends. I leave it in anywhere from 15-30 minutes (sometimes while I pump!) and then rinse. Adds a healthy shine and softness that your hair might need!

5. Butter Substitute: If you know me well enough, you know I get carried away with the butter knife. I had extra butter, peanut butter, and Nutella to anything and everything and sometimes I wonder why I'm not 900 pounds. You're gonna say lucky you but not really. Fast metabolism, maybe but in fact, my heart is thanking me after I substituted butter for coconut oil. Stir it in your oatmeal, on your toast, whatever! TRY IT.

6. Diaper Rash Cream: Every babe gets a diaper rash, at least once in their little lives. If not, SHARE YOUR SECRET MOMMA. Well my little dude has gotten a pretty good (I really mean awful) diaper rash. Slap some coconut oil on those cheeks and you'll be happy you read this blog.

7. Tanning Lotion: Okay who doesn't like to be tan?? I didn't say orange (I've been there though) but tan. At least a little color anyways is always nice to have. You can use it for inside or outside tanning, smells good and adds as an extra moisturizer.

8. Fat: Coconut oil also comes in a pill form. I bought mine from Wal Mart for cheap. I take mine for one main reason, and that's to add extra fats to my breast milk. Babies need fat, and it's very important for their growth. This helps with that a lot and is also known for it's exceptional health benefits, including nutrients that helps promote vibrant health and energy. IT WORKS.

9. Chapstick: This is pretty self explanatory. I scoop a tablespoon out and put it in a little tin container I bought and throw it in my bag. Refill as needed.

10. Tea, Coffee Creamer or Smoothie Additive: Another way for your heart to thank you. Say no to coffee creamers that ad an extra 300 plus calories to your drink and replace with coconut oil. Add some extra flavor to your fruit smoothies or that dull tasting tea.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Something was very wrong, and I knew it.

So, I'm a little late in the game (3 months late) but I've decided to blog about my journey as a first time mother of a preemie baby. But lets be honest here, can you blame me for being a little behind?

Living life in the NICU is the farthest thing from freedom and I don't have as much as 5 minutes on my hands between working 40 hours a week, driving an hour and 15 minutes everyday, and finding time to feed my husband and two cats. So why in heavens am I writing a blog? I DON'T KNOW. Just kidding! Now that things have settled down in our lives I thought that now would be a good time to share the absolute rawness of this experience. Believe me, people are curious. And I mean that in the most non sarcastic way. Strangers care, people wanna know how you're handling it, and they love hearing updates on him. As to why we started a Facebook page as soon as our little boy was born. It helped us keep family, friends, co-workers and absolute strangers updated. Because it got sickening REAL FAST trying to call 100 people a day and repeating the same crap over and over. And it turned out even better than we had thought. It has over 1,400 'likes' and they keep coming! Now would be a good time for me to say Thank You! :)

Here's the page if you'd like to check it out: Jett's Fighter Pilots


 A lot of people wonder how a baby becomes a premature one. Most don't understand how it starts and often ask as if it were a personal choice to give birth so early. UM, no.

I found out I was pregnant in late September and was told during my first few prenatal appointments I was having a happy, healthy baby. Everything was going as planned and there were zero problems. I had my appointments once a month and of course, like every first time momma, I called the nurse a few times a week frantically explaining how my belly button turned brown (yes, it really did lol) or how I never sleep at night because I wake up to pee about every 2 hours.
IS THIS NORMAL?
ARE YOU SURE ITS NORMAL?
I HAVEN'T POOPED IN THREE DAYS! (yes, that's normal too I guess)
Let me just get this out there now, pregnancy does some really weird crap to your body. And I'm sure my husband thought that his once gorgeous wife is now turning into an alien. Funny story-around the same time I got pregnant, we also adopted a kitten from our Human Society. Well this cute little girl had some serious butt problems (lucky us) and would let these awful farts out and sometimes even liquid-y turds would follow (I did warn you about my grossly honest life). As I said before, pregnancy screws with you, and some things would be to your advantage, others not so much. For instance, my superhuman sense of smell. All of a sudden I could smell EVERYTHING. I smelled the neighbors BO when he came home from work or my favorite breadsticks from Olive Garden (we live no where near an Olive Garden).
Anyways, this kitten was obviously old enough to feel shameful because that little shit would hide in places I never knew existed and fart her heart out. One evening my hubby and I almost tore our home apart after we couldn't get rid of the awful poopy stench. Well thank the heavens you knocked me up because I was able to sniff out a turd hidden behind our couch. Yes, proud momma moment, I know. (My husband still proudly smiles at me when we speak of it lol). One of the many advantages of being pregnant. Thanks honey!

Anyways~
Months and months go by and I've finally reached my 7th month of pregnancy. Just barely, it was my first week in my 3rd trimester and I was 27weeks 7days. I had been working a lot this week, rearranging our home, and preparing our spare bedroom as a nursery. I felt great though! My morning sickness was long gone, I was sleeping a full 7-8 hours, eating everything in site and staying hydrated. I loved being pregnant and enjoyed all the compliments (as every momma should). I had been working second shift the night I thought that something was weird. I felt sorta off, and I noticed a decrease in baby kicks. I swore that I was just overreacting and being the hypochondriac that I am. A friend of mine, who was a few weeks ahead of me in her pregnancy had persuaded me to go in and get checked out. It took lots of persuasion by the way, in fear I was just being over cautious and didn't want to embarrass myself at the clinic. I promised I would go in the next morning since it was my first day off in a few weeks. That following morning, I slept in, late. Like 11:30am late. I never sleep in that late! I woke up feeling groggy with no desire to step out of bed. But I knew, I needed to see a doctor as I still wasn't feeling my little guy move around. It had been almost three days since I last felt him move (I know, I waited too long-bad momma moment). I threw on some sweats and hopped in the car and showed up to my unscheduled prenatal appointment while my husband was still at work (This is bringing on some serious chills as I back tract to three months ago).
I waited in that waiting room for what felt like 45 minutes, but was only 15. I was feeling some intense back pains and felt lightheaded. I changed my focus and tried to read posters on the wall and a sign I clearly couldn't comprehend. I could feel my body go into a presence I've never felt before. I was reading this sign over and over again in my head, but I just did understand it.
Please stand behind this sign to give other patients privacy, Thank You.
"....um, what the heck does that mean?" Why couldn't my brain comprehend a sentence but just 15 minutes ago I drove myself to this very spot? Something was very wrong, and I knew it.

Finally, I was in my little room waiting for the nurse to get in. She asked me a few questions about how I was feeling and what my concerns were. We listened to the heartbeat which was totally normal and nothing about my symptoms seemed to be out of ordinary. I needed to see my baby. I begged for an ultra sound because I am momma bear and I'll rip you a new one if I don't get to see my precious pea on a tv screen. TELL ME EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT. PROOVE IT. Unfortunately, my ultra sound tech was completely silent as I stared deeply into the black and white blob.
"Does everything look good? I'm probably overreacting but I just thought it was weird I couldn't feel him move. I'm sure he's fine, sorry for all the trouble." I waited for an answer, but all I could hear was the clicking of the keyboard and he measured my little dudes head circumference. I could feel my face turn red when he finally broke the silence, "I don't think your baby is very healthy anymore, excuse me, I need to speak with Dr. Cleveland." And he shut the door behind him, leaving me in tears and a tummy full of lube.

I could hear them speak unidentifiable words outside the door. The tech then entered the room after a brief discussion and helped clean up my belly. My doctor was speaking medical terms through a phone and pacing around the hall while a nurse walked me to a room with a big comfy recliner. They wrapped bands around my belly while they watched baby's heartbeat on receipt print off a computer. This is called a Non Stress Test(NST). It measures fetal heart rate, movements, and contractions. Obviously it was telling them things were not so well as the belt was ripped off my belly and I was yanked up out of my sitting position. My water bottle was taken from my hand and in turn was handed a few Kleenex's while the black tears from my lashes started uncontrollably flowing.
"Eva, I just got off the phone with a specialist, and you need to deliver your baby right now. Things do not look well with the baby and we feel very concerned for you and the baby's well-being. Are you able to drive?"
"What? Drive? Drive where? What's wrong with my baby? What's wrong with my well-being?" I threw at her a hundred other questions as I wiped my face with my sleeve.

"I need you to drive to the hospital, it's snowing and it will take 15 minutes for the ambulance to get here, and another 15 minutes for them to take you there. We don't have that kind of time. I need you to drive. I will meet you there and they will be ready for you when you get there. You need to deliver your baby because your lives are in serious danger."

So yes, I drove myself to the hospital in the start of a snow storm while having back contractions and not knowing if my baby that I've been growing for the past 7 months would survive. And yes, I remember all of our brief conversation. I remember those words flowing from her lips like I heard it this morning. I'll never forget it. And sure shit, they met me at the front desk with a wheelchair (which I refused to sit in) and escorted me to the labor and delivery floor where moments later my husband and mother also met me. A phone in one hand and a fist with the other, his face was white and full of tears. Just as confused and concerned as I, he put on a brave face and showed his wife how strong he could be.

I delivered our little Jett at 6:23pm February 12th, 2014 via emergency c-section. Two and a half months early and weighing in at just 1lb. 6.5oz. But he came out fighting, red, slimy and screaming. All of which, we were warned would not happen. Tears of joy, and tears of sadness. My husband looked down at me and squeezed my hand, and we prayed. Right there in the chaos of it all.

Here's to the start of new journey...

You're Pretty Darn Awesome

First off, I'd love to just say, HEY, I think you're pretty darn awesome for checking out my blog!

As for now, it's pretty bare and boring, but I'm working my fingers off and I'm totally, not even sure what the heck I'm doing, but I'm doing it anyways because its kinda like "my calling".

Okay, so I can already tell you are so deeply interested in what the heck I have to say (can you sense the sarcasm?) so you're welcome to take that little pointer finger and aim that arrow right at the big red X on the right hand side of your screen and you'll never have to read another word about my life.

OR

You could keep on reading and stay tuned to these absolutely, amazing things I have to talk about!  I will say, I have some pretty awesome, creative, "wow that's super cute", and hilarious ideas I've just been dying to share with the world. But if you're not a momma or soon to be, you might want to seriously consider clicking the big X and never read this blog again because, well, that's the kinda crap I like to write about. And I may or may not scare you off with some of the grossly honest things that go on in my daily routine.

So....stay tuned because I promise (pinky swear) I'll be adding some sweet shit to this site and I can guarantee you'll be saying to yourself, "I LOVE READING ABOUT YOUR LIFE!" (again, with the sarcasm)

Love your new friend,

Eva xo

:)